Here comes the Armaguard truck . It comes every Tuesday with change for the tills, but it also carries a more precious cargo – the sweaty-fingered thrill of a secret love. Me and Matt sit on milk crates in the loading dock. I unwrap my sandwich: peanut butter. Matt’s eating salami today.

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The creature never introduced itself.

It walked through the front door one evening, sat down in the lounge room and started laying out its things. We were all too polite to ask its name, or where it was from, or why, indeed, it had visited us. So, we just... never spoke about it.

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